Dear Mr. Ex President Clinton:
I recently saw a bumper sticker that said, “Thank me, I voted for
Clinton-Gore.” So, I sat down and reflected on that, and I am sending
my “Thank you” for what you have done, specifically:
1. Thank you for introducing us to Jennifer Flowers, Paula Jones,
Monica Lewinsky, Dolly Kyle Browning, Kathleen Willey, and Juanita Broderick.
Did I leave anyone out?
2. Thank you for teaching my 8 year old about oral sex. I had really
planned to wait until they were older to discuss it with them, but now
they know more about it than I did as a senior in college.
3. Thank you for showing us that sexual harassment in the work place
(especially the White House) and on the job is OK, and all you have to
know is what the meaning of “is” is. It really is great to know that
certain sexual acts are not sex, and one person may have sex while the other
one involved does NOT have sex.
4. Thank you for reintroducing the concept of impeachment to a new
generation and demonstrating that the ridiculous plot of the movie
“Wag the Dog” could be plausible after all.
5. Thanks for making Jimmy Carter look competent, Gerald Ford look
graceful, Richard Nixon look honest, Lyndon Johnson look truthful, and
John Kennedy look moral.
6. Thank you for the 73 House and Senate witnesses who have pled the
5th Amendment and 17 witnesses who have fled the country to avoid
testifying about Democratic campaign fund raising.
7. Thank you, for the 19 charges, 8 convictions, and 4
imprisonment’s from he Whitewater “mess” and the 55 criminal charges and 32 criminal
convictions (so far) in the other “Clinton” scandals.
8. Thanks also for reducing our military by half, “gutting” much of
our foreign policy, and flying all over the world on “vacations” carefully
disguised as necessary trips.
9. Thank you, also, for “finding” millions of dollars— I really
didn’t need it in the first place, and I can’t think of a more well deserving
group of recipients for my hard-earned dollars than jet fuel for all of your
globe-trotting. I understand you, the family and your cronies have
logged in more time aboard Air Force One than any other administration.
10. Now that you’ve left the White House, thanks for the 140 pardons
of convicted felons and indicted felons-in-exile. We will love to have
them rejoin society. (Not to mention the scores he pardoned while Governor
11. Thanks also for removing the White House silverware. I’m sure
that Laura Bush didn’t like the pattern anyway. Also, enjoy the
housewarming gifts you’ve received from your “friends.”
12. Thanks to you and your staff in the West Wing of the White House
for vandalizing and destroying government property on the way out. I also
appreciate removing all of that excess weight (China, silverware,
linen, towels, ash trays, soap, pens, magnetic compass, flight manuals, etc.)
out of Air Force 1. The weight savings means burning less fuel, thus less
tax dollars spent on jet fuel. Thank you!
13. And finally, please ensure that Hillary enjoys the $8 million
dollar advance for her upcoming “tell-all” book and you, Bill, the $10
million advance for your memoirs. Who says crime doesn’t pay!
14. The last and most important point – thank you for forcing Israel
to let Mohammed Atta go free. Terrorist pilot Mohammed Atta blew up a bus
in Israel in 1986. The Israelis captured, tried and imprisoned him. As
part of the Oslo agreement with the Palestinians in 1993, Israel had to agree
to release so-called “political prisoners”. However, the Israelis would
not release any with blood on their hands. The American President at the
time, Bill Clinton, and his Secretary of State, Warren Christopher,
“insisted” that all prisoners be released. Thus Mohammed Atta was freed and
eventually thanked the US by flying an airplane into Tower One of the World Trade
Center. This was reported by many of the American TV networks at the
time that the terrorists were first identified. It was censored in the US
from all later reports. Why shouldn’t Americans know the real truth?
What a guy!!
A US Citizen
PS. Please pass along a special thank you to Al Gore for “inventing”
the Internet, without which I would not be able to post this wonderful
AND THE REST OF THE STORY
Hillary Rodham Clinton, as a New York State Senator, now comes under
the “Congressional Retirement and Staffing Plan,” which means that even if
she never gets reelected, she STILL receives her Congressional salary
until she dies. (Would it not be nice if all Americans were pension eligible
after only 6 years?)
If Bill outlives her, he then inherits HER salary until HE dies. He
is already getting his Presidential salary until he dies. If Hillary
outlives Bill, she also gets HIS salary until she dies. Guess who pays for
It’s common knowledge that in order for her to establish NY
residency, they purchased a million dollar-plus house in upscale Chappaqua, New
York. Makes sense. They are entitled to Secret Service protection for life.
Still makes sense.
Here is where it becomes interesting. Their mortgage payments hover
at around $10,000 per month. BUT, an extra residence HAD to be built
within the acreage to house the Secret Service agents.
The Clintons charge the Federal government $10,000 monthly rent for
the use of that extra residence, which is just about equal to their
mortgage payment. This means that we, the taxpayers, are paying the Clinton’s
salary, mortgage, transportation, safety and security, as well as the salaries for
their 12 man staff — and, this is all perfectly legal!
When she runs for President, will you vote for her?